Hey Reader, I recently received an email from one of our Wednesday 1-2-3 readers sharing this super relatable challenge: “setting goals I can stay with over time.” Woof – me too! In my day job, I train teachers in a style of education known as project-based learning. And one of the things I talk most with teachers about is how we can emphasize “process over product” in our classrooms. (You can probably guess: I have a lot of critical things to say about standardized testing.) In other words, I work with teachers to emphasize the daily process of learning rather than focusing on the “thing” that gets turned in (or not) at the end. When I think about goal-setting, I come at it from a similar place: How can we, through daily actions and practices, move directionally toward the person we want to become, without grasping onto our image of a specific desired endpoint or outcome? This is a massive mindset shift for those of us living in environments committed to SMART Goals and productivity-based evaluation. But here’s the invitation of process-oriented goal-setting: Instead of creating and committing to specific “endpoint goals,” try experimenting with daily actions and practices that move you, loosely and playfully, toward what you want to happen. A couple examples:
Find the daily practices that fit who you are and move you in an intentional way toward the person you feel yourself becoming. Jerry Colonna refers to this as “incremental progress that’s directionally correct.” (My short guide on how to create these kinds of daily practices is linked below.) It flies in the face of almost everything I’ve been taught in the professional setting – and in most of my schooling. And, to be honest, it doesn’t work for everything; sometimes urgency necessitates more time-bound goals. But I know from experience this style of process-oriented goal setting feels a lot better, less guilt-inducing, more stick-to-able, and more playful for me. A big thank you to Cassandra for sharing this challenge with me! If you’re wrestling with a specific challenge or issue, feel free to hit reply and I’ll either send you a personal reply or dedicate a future edition of The Wednesday 1-2-3 to you! (Or both!) ❓ Questions
🧰 Resources
📅 Upcoming September EventsSeptember 5th: Sweatshirt SessionWith the election gearing up, and all the anxiety, stress, and energy coming with it, this 90-minute “sweatshirt session,” co-hosted with Kimberly Novosel, is all about grounding ourselves in practices of self-connection and staying soft, yet fierce, in the midst of it. I hope you’ll consider joining us. September 14th: Fireside Chat with James A. PearsonIn-Person: If you live in the Seattle-Tacoma area, come on by Grit City Books in Tacoma for a conversation with poet and friend-of-the-W123, James A. Pearson. I'll be playing "host" and James will be reading from his book "The Wilderness That Bears Your Name." It'll start right at 5:30pm. You can RSVP here. September 16th, 23rd, 30th: Get-Out-the-Vote Letter Writing PartiesWant to do something that can make an impact on our upcoming presidential election? Join 20-or-so of us in writing letters to swing-state voters encouraging them to vote in November. If you're interested, just hit "reply" and I'll send you all the info on how this works and the Zoom link. Hope all is well-enough with you, |
Inner work frameworks, practices, and questions – all in a five-minute read. Delivered to your inbox every Wednesday morning before you even wake up. Written and curated by Andrew Lang.
Hey Reader, This week, I’m passing along a practice from one of my colleagues, Taj M. Smith. Taj shared this in a recent newsletter and I love how he speaks about time. I often find myself going way too fast, so while practices like this can sometimes seem silly, they can also be really helpful in re-setting myself. If you feel yourself tempted to skim it, hit “archive,” and move on – especially if you’re reading this early in the morning – I invite you to try it literally right now with...
Hey Reader, A quick reminder to start us off 👇 Tomorrow night, Kimberly Novosel and I will be hosting our first “sweatshirt session!” If you’re feeling a bit exhausted by the world and want a few new practices for self-connection and staying soft, yet fierce, I hope you’ll consider joining us. Today's focus is on a concept used in family systems therapy known as the “transitional character.” This is someone who becomes a change-maker in their family lineage by refusing to pass down...
Hey Reader, Every minute of every day, we’re making decisions. (I know, I know – I wrote about decision making last week too.) Sometimes the decisions we make are fully grounded, well thought-out, and exude the energy we want to embody in the world. And sometimes…they aren’t. Instead, they can be reactive to what’s going on around us and unconsciously (and uncritically) informed by the under-the-surface movements going on within us. This week has been busy in my life (a new position at work,...